Vidya Bhushan Rawat |
| Blog | Posted By: hindtodaynews on:5/3/2012 12:59:27 PM |
Dana Sangama, an MBA student of Amity International in Manesar, Gurgaon ‘committed’ suicide on April 24th after being ‘caught’ for ‘cheating’ in the examination. It was alleged that she was using her mobile internet to in the examination hall. Dana hailed from Meghalaya and was niece of the chief minister of Meghalaya Mr Mukul Sangama who demanded full probe into the ‘suicide’. The Chief Minister also wanted a new legislation to deal with atrocities and discrimination against the students of the North Eastern States in various metropolitan cities of India.
A week before Dana committed ‘suicide’ came the news of the ‘suicide’ of Richard Loitam, 19, a student in Banglore though originally from Manipur state. The autopsy report revealed that it was not the case of suicide but of open murder.
Cases of torture, atrocities, rapes and murders continue to pour in against the students of North Eastern states from various parts of the country. Their girls are more vulnerable for their alleged ‘life styles’ which is considered to be ‘lose character’ and ‘cheaply’ ‘available’. It need to be understood as why has these incidents happening in different parts of India and what could be the remedial measures.
Delhi was considered to be unsafe place for the North Eastern people to live as they faced lot of prejudices here but now the incidents from Mumbai and Banglore also reflect the growing discrimination against the people from north east? Is it because they look better than us? Is it because they are fairer than us and have a better life style than us? Are the people from rest of India feeling that people from ‘North East’ are potential threat to their employment as the young boys and girls are now taking up management courses, medical profession and others.There are many things but most important point of discrimination or looking at them is their social cultural behavior. India remains a feudal state. A city like Delhi was always surrounded by peasantry castes which were not only feudal in nature but also patriarchical in their values. The male female ratio of Delhi clearly reveals the ‘dirty picture’ of our culture which does not feel shame in killing the girls in the womb itself. It does not feel shame in buying the women from outside for fulfilling the social practice of marriage. Marriage here is nothing but a contract to produce children and have sex.
The problem is that our boys and girls grow up in families with their ‘cultural values’. They have seen their mothers working obediently at home, laughing sheepishly even when their male members in the family contemptuously jokes at them, work without any question. Those who have seen their sisters inside home, completely submitting to parental pressure and who can only wear cloths if her ‘parents’ or ‘partner’ allow them can’t really imagine how male female relationship goes beyond these barriers. That girls and boys can be complimentary and enjoy life without being obsessed and contemptuous to each other is not acceptable. When roles are defined for women than anybody who does not fit in the pattern is unacceptable. Dissent is a crime and the result is ‘honored killing’. We have seen how children are killed by their parents without feeling remorse about it just for the sake of their ‘ijjat. In such an environment, North Eastern boys and girls are a challenge. Most of them wear good cloths, look smarter, speak English and mix with each other so well that itself is a challenged to machosim of ours. The general remark is how girls are attracted to these boys who have ‘nothing’ in them. The common male attitude here seems to be any boy and girl has to talk sex only. And for ‘attracting’ girls you need a macho image and have to be influential. These values are regularly fed to us through our popular TV channels, in our films in which ‘rich’ and ‘muscular’ boys look down upon the girls and force them to be liked by them. Now, how can anyone force upon someone to love or befriend. But this is the case with these ill fed boys who we simply call mumma’s boys.
Anyone who has seen how the shop owners talk to a girl who is not having a ‘dupatta’ over her top will be different than a typical ‘bharatiya nari’ who is offered a seat. The problem is that we look upon the wives as replica of our mothers who take care of us and feed us at home. But a complete contrast of our homely values outside our home is a cultural shock for us and we try to condemn them to make our women feel ‘important’ inside homes despite the known fact that each one of us want to have a ‘look’ at them. The problem is not with the look or talk but the way people ‘measure’ these girls from the North East or from Western World shows that as a society we have not matured. The fact is that people from North East and many other hill states including Nepal, Himachal and Uttarakhand enjoy a much better men women relationship in their regions as these regions do not have feudalism as the core of their value. Many social movements in these regions are lead by women and participated by all. Therefore, it is a shocking surprise for many people from plains when they visit any of these regions and see the women in the street, in the work places, in the schools and colleges without any fear and in confidence in the form of portraying their sexuality in terms of her expression and her right to wear whatever she likes and chose a partner of her choice is still, seen as a challenge to mainstream society.
It is also important for us to demystify Indian nationalism from the north Indian upper caste value based nationalism to a broader secular and diverse system where different culture exist. That every part of India is not Hindi speaking and oppressing its women should be the core of teaching of our children. That boys and girls are equal in their rights and values and no society can claim to be rich and stronger unless it provides an equal space for growth of its women and marginalized. People from North East has equal claim to be in any Indian city as people from Delhi, Mumbai or Banlgore have to north east. On its part, our government institutions must provide speedy justice to these issues of violation of fundamental rights of the people from North East. India cannot afford to isolate its own people in the name of culture. There is no need for the North Eastern people to change as it is the ‘mainstream’ India which need to change and become more liberal to its women and girl children. If the one lesson rest of India can learn from the north east is to respect its women and make them partner in our overall development rather than looking down upon them as mere dolls and products.
(The writer is a full-time human rights activist )